Author: Sanjeev Kotnala

By Sanjeev Kotnala

 

As I write this article, I realise that Bhagwan Shri Rama has taken over everything. The social media feed is full of messages about the consecration of Lord Ram. I hear serene hymns from the three temples that have been silent for a long time. Jai Shri Ram flags decorate the skyline, overshadowing the humble dwellings – that’s what catches my eye. It’s like a scene from a mythological or historical TV series. It resembles a Ram’s army camp at war, adorned with flags. The autos move around with the flag, and the market is doing fast business on saffron-coloured stoles, flags, kurtas and T-shirts. The flags are everywhere, and every temple resonates with celebration. Firework stalls have sprung up, and by the time I finish writing, the sounds outside will resonate loudly with bursting crackers – signalling a new wave of Hindu thoughts and pride. Jai Shree Ram.

 

It feels like a new Diwali- the markets are decorated and lit through the evening. The clay lamps on the roadside are doing brisk business. However, today, when the ceremony takes place, the roads are quiet and deserted, reminiscent of the days during the telecast of the Ramayan.

 

Most Hindus in the nation celebrate with pride but with cautious secularism. It is, after all, inclusive and rooted in the Sanatana tradition. It’s safe to say – Diwali is here. Victory to Lord Rama. I say I am an Indian and a Hindu and not necessarily a Hindu and an Indian. The nation comes first. Hence, where I rejoice at the temple construction and Pran Pratishta, I regret that there was bloodshed to get it. Jai Shri Ram.

 

Huge event

One can appreciate the intense efforts by the Sangh and BJP, turning the Pran Pratishta ceremony into a grand success. The success and engagement were never in doubt. But to enhance it, making arrangements, motivating citizens, and encouraging on-ground participation needed to be well executed. Well done. Jai Shri Ram.

No one minds if it seems politically motivated with elections and vote banks in sight. Having endured neglect, the majority are content with being at the centre of attention. Victory to Lord Ram. Modi makes it possible. Jai Shri Ram.

 

The instigators continue to raise their voice

Yes, there are still posts circulating questioning the validity of the consecration, its religious sanctity, and it being constructed on a demolished mosque site. There are even posters congratulating Congress and Rajiv Gandhi for realising the dream. These are irritants of the first order, unable to see the pride and unity on this day of celebration. It’s a time when the long-suppressed aspirations of the majority are finding some answers. Sometimes, the wise need to stay silent. Their statements only reveal their intent – foolishness and a desire for divisive politics. The modern citizens of the country are more aware and taking note. Jai Shri Ram.

 

Boost to Religion-based tourism

Religious tourism in India is set to boom like never before. The triangle of Prayagraj, Varanasi, and Ayodhya is complete. The Char Dham yatra is a reality- though much more must be done for management and infrastructure support. The South has always been well managed, though Government interference is a concern for many devotees. Tirupati, Madurai, and many other places of worship in the South have their own importance. The East boasts Puri and Kamakhya. The jyotirlingas are spread across the country. The Golden Temple. The Buddha circuit. Dwarka and Somnath in the West, Asthvinayak in the Konkan. Ajmer Dargah, Haji Ali, and Deoband – all will see a surge. It’s going to boost infrastructure and business. Jai Shree Ram.

Some places need stricter environmental policies and tourism management. Regularising facilities should be a priority at all destinations. Tough decisions are required for safety and security, but that’s for another time. For now, let’s revel in the joy of Pran Pratishta. Jai Shri Ram.

 

Useless debate

The debate about mixing politics and religion is old and useless. They were never separate. The history is witness to its use and misuse. I hope that as a new-age secular state, the country will promote every religion and contribute to the systematic, orderly management of all places of worship. They will all be under the same rules and support. Jai Shri Ram.

I respect the party for delivering on the promise- Mandir Wahi Banayenge and the Pran Pratishta. However, I am against and do not favour any politicisation of the stage and sending political messages under the grab of a note to the nation. Yes, there will always be politics in religion and religion in politics- and it will be hard to separate the two. However, the need is to knowingly and cautiously control the skew. Jai Shri Ram.

 

Plan to visit Ayodhya

Having witnessed the somewhat poorly covered ceremony, I’m happy to have a virtual darshan and make plans for the future. A small check on the travel site flashed unrealistically stretched rates. Understanding the expected surge of curiosity fuelled, I have been there crowd – one is taking it slow and planning for a later date. Jai Shri Ram.

 

Net-net

Today, I am proud of the Pran Pratishta at the Shree Ram

Chandra mandir. I’m delighted to have witnessed this ceremony online. It seemed an impossible dream for long.

I’m pleased to see a somewhat south-Indian-style decoration of the statue. The initial reaction was akin to having darshan in the Puri or Tirupati temples. But with a slightly longer darshan and the euphoria of the darshan, colour and decoration no longer matter. People debating and doubting must understand that it’s not a matter of belief but a result of faith, which is unwavering and unquestionable. So, the debate about historical figures, mythology, reality, or mere imagination doesn’t matter. I welcome an era of Hindu resurgence with the Pran Pratishta at Ayodhya. Jai Shree Ram. It is Pran Pratishta in Hindus.

 

Add-on

If Hathway could create days benefiting many industries, January 22 could be the day – the second Diwali, Deepoutsav, pushing the economy with market initiatives and celebration. It may be the push we need for the national economy after the market lull post-Diwali in the third quarter.

 

Sanjeev Kotnala is a senior business strategist and author. He writes on MxMIndia on Wednesdays, and sometimes on other days as well. His views here are personal.

 

By Sanjeev Kotnala

 

No one will dispute that we all strive to be better than we have been before. It encapsulates the complete philosophy of life. And something that I endorse and follow. Hence, my wishes for everyone have been simple- ‘May Your Today Always Be Better Than Your Yesterday’. My cousin Manish Thapliyal found some wisdom by telling me that this is the nice thing he learned from me. On the other hand, my ex-colleague Mukul Bakshi would find it funny and play it back differently whenever I wished him on his birthday.

 

However reading on Kindle ‘My Hanuman Chalisa’ by Devdutt Patinayak as the first book of 2024, I realised these simple statements with deeper meanings must be translated and shared with a broader audience.

 

The wish and the essence of being better than yesterday are hugely personal and growth-oriented. It talks and refers to resilience and the perpetual journey towards self-improvement. It is the best wish one can extend to others, with an honest, sincere, heartfelt hope that today surpasses yesterday in every conceivable way.

 

Life Is like a long train with vestibule modular interconnected boogies. These interconnected boogies are your timelines, and you move from one to another, not knowing how long your train is and when you will reach the end. Such interconnected life episodes shape our existence- because they shape our experiences and expectations.

 

However, when the goal is a win-win for all. When it is not about outshining others or defeating others but to outgrow one’s former self. Just for you to be better, someone need not be bad. It reminds you to create a better today, which is based on a past that is a history is about continuous learning, introspection, and the willingness to embrace change as a catalyst for progress. You approach every day as a new sunrise of opportunity. A day where you can become a bit better. A day you can nudge yourself a wee bit closer to your goals. An opportunity to rectify mistakes, learn from experiences, and carve a path towards personal evolution.

 

In past, we have an uncontrolled but established kaleidoscope of moments. Full of accomplishments, failures, and lessons that have defined us. And when you try to be better regularly and keep that as a sole aim, you acknowledge that life is a journey, a work in progress, and each day is a canvas waiting to be painted with the brushstrokes of improvement.

 

This concept I follow and wish more can see meaning in extends beyond tangible achievements and physical materialistic acquisitions and acknowledgements. It shows the intricate flow of emotional intelligence, resilience, perseverance, self-understanding, clear objectives and mindfulness.

 

Being better than yesterday is about professional life, personal life, relationships, understanding, craft and culture, experiences and expectations. It is a subtle refinement of one’s character, the cultivation of empathy, and the development of a resilient spirit capable of navigating life’s unpredictable terrain. A little bit better today is better prepared to address future uncertainties.

 

Like every other journey in life, the journey to being better is also full of setbacks and challenges. However, one can take these hurdles and challenges as stepping stones to move forward. Remembering that the past is dead. The past is certain. The past is like the closed pages of the book. And the moment that matters is NOW and HERE. The future is unpredictable.

 

Past should be looked at from the filter of PaRAM, pause, reflect, Absorb the learnings and just move on without the baggage. Dropping baggage every time helps to be light in mind and heart. It gives you scope to accommodate more. It is about taking the lesson and moving on and becoming a wee bit richer in your understanding, a little better prepared and a wee bit better. That’s all that is needed.

 

Hence, I always wish a person with “May your today be better than your yesterday”. It is an acknowledgement of being human and the expected vagaries of life, and an encouragement, urging and nudging the individual to face challenges- work out solutions, work with optimism and get better than he or she was yesterday.

 

This thought of continuous improvement also fosters a sense of Gratitude. It acknowledges the progress made. It, in turn, appreciates and celebrates success, change, and betterment- no matter how small. It has a continuum of Gratitude for the lessons learned, the opportunities presented in life, and the opportunities one exploits. It asks you to treat every day as a celebration of progress, a day with a positive ripple in life that includes those around you.

 

The pursuit of being better than yesterday can transcend boundaries. It can be about the collective improvement ethos, inspiring communities and societies to evolve and progress together. The desire for collective advancement becomes a shared aspiration, creating a ripple effect that elevates the entire human experience.

 

Pahaadi, the short story contest for writers with roots in Uttarakhand that I curate, is one small example. It even has the absolute understanding and delight of considering every participating writer a winner. When an unpublished or published writer sends the entry, they have taken that extra step, full of expectations, confidence, and faith to move forward and be better than yesterday.

 

Net-net

The only thing in life that truly matters is the commitment to being better than you were yesterday. And that is my wish for all of you. “May your today be better than your yesterday.”. So, as each day unfolds, let us embrace the opportunity to evolve, learn, and strive to make today better than yesterday. This can be related to everything you do in your personal or professional life. Branding and advertising, start-ups, innovation and marketing try doing the same thing from a different perspective.

………………………………………………………………….

 

This is one of the critical thoughts and rules I have synthesised from my experience in life. It is discussed in detail in my forthcoming book,  ’24 Rules of Life- I Wish I Had Known Earlier’. The book will be released in the 3rd or 4th week of March 2024. If the book interests you and you want to get updates on the book, please email me at netkot@yahoo.com or WhatsApp at 9819728963.

And if you agree with the thought, there is a good book to read. ‘Get Better at Getting Better‘ by Chandramouli Venkatesan.

 

By Sanjeev Kotnala

 

Maybe things will now improve, and my pathetic score of reading books on Kindle will improve with it. Yes, I am still one of those prehistoric animals with a voracious reading habit. But my comfort level with digital (Kindle-Playbook or KoBo) and audio listening platforms (Audible) is limited or uncomfortable. I proudly claim that I can, at max, read two-three A4 pages of a contract or a proposal on screen, and beyond that, I must download to read. I would love to know your experience and preference and correlate it with your age.

 

I am still a book reader who prefers the charm and joy of flipping through the pages of an engaging book while enjoying a cup of my favourite drink- tea. The added advantage is bright sunshine, sitting on the balcony or a terrace and immersing myself in the books recommended by friends or referred by the authors of the books I may have read. Two people I trust entirely on their book recommendations are Suman Srivastava and Sabu Paul.

 

On the other side, I have a membership of Audible and Unlimited Kindle, which I must have signed sometime under the impression that it would further help my book reading or help me use time better. Nothing like that happened. Instead, I went through the painful ( yet required) process of monthly recurring payment setup on a credit card!

 

At times, I wanted to cancel the membership, but then a simple maths told me that listening to or reading at least 6 books on them would pay for the membership. The economics of membership made sense. I added listening and reading 6 books to my checklist three months back. Desperately wanting to reach that figure before the end of the year and get back to my year end article on recommendation on books to read. Something that I used to do regularly.

 

Unfortunately, I have disappointed myself. The aura of self-discipline I had built around me was broken. I am still working on books to read on Kindle, though I have managed to listen to a few on Audible. The audible score is much better than Kindle, primarily because of the time I have travelled alone.

 

I enjoyed listening to ‘The Mystery of Hanuman Neem Karoli Baba’ by Sripad Jagannathan Dasa, ‘Ghost of the Silent Hills’ by Anita Krishnan, ‘Night Train at Deoli’ by Ruskin Bond, ‘Jannat aur anya Kahaniyan’ by Kushwant Singh, ‘Ravan’ (sounded so good on Audible) and ‘war of Lanka’ by Amish Tripathi, ‘The Girl in room 105’ by Chetan Bhagat ( yes I did listen to it), ‘Mafia Queens of Mumbai’ by Jane Borges and S Hussain Zaidi (Recommended) and ‘An Indian Spy in Pakistan’ by Mohanlal Bhaskar. Stories were so easy on the ear. And as I look back and try listing, I find a decent score of books on Audible.

 

On the other hand, books like ‘The Buddha Said’ by Osho and a few others, ‘Life’s Amazing Secrets’ by Gaur Gopal Das, and ‘The subtle art of not giving a F*ck’ by Mark Manson were thought-provoking, and Audible did add to the impact.

 

Audible also introduced me to a wonderful author Maurice Leblanc- I read ‘An Extraordinary Adventure of Arsene Lupin’.

 

A brilliant book I never knew about was ‘Erotic Stories for Punjabi Widows’ by Balli Kaur Jaswal; it sounds corny- but if you are on Audible- listen to it.

 

There were very few disasters in choice, far fewer than in the physical books I picked. Because audio takes that additional effort, and the choices get filtered if they do. However , I did listen to my disaster ‘Bad Mommas’

 

I found audible better to listen to audio dramas and series like ‘Nut Jobs’, ‘Days that changed the World’, ‘Meri Priya Kahaniyan’ by Amrita Pritam’, ‘My Dad the Spy’, ‘Hijacked Histories’, ‘Kissa Khwabo ka‘ ‘Dil Local’, ‘Diary’, ‘Kaali Awaazein’, ‘True North Heist’, ‘Comedy Club’, ‘Alien: out of the shadow’, ‘The Butterfly effect’. They were well-produced and a pleasure to listen to. And I still claim I am not a podcast listener.

 

‘Atomic Habits’ by James Clear was downloaded but read in physical form. After that, I started following him on social media and signed up for his very useful Thursday Thoughts. ‘The Power of Subconscious Mind’ by Joseph Murphy was a delight. I am on ‘Don’t Believe Everything You Think’ by Joseph Nguyen- which is challenging to listen to. And some 13 books bought on Audible Credit and downloaded wait their turn.

 

Frankly, that makes me think that some books are better heard than read, and some should never be heard but read. What do you think?

 

Sometime back, I was introduced to speed control on audible. I tried listening at 1.5x, but truthfully, anything beyond 1.2X was a waste and negatively impacted the experience. It also marred the efforts that the voice-over artist and the team have put in while recording the book with all the strategically chosen pauses, tonality and, at times, special effects. Books on Audible must be heard at the speed they have been recorded, and that means that I am in a long period of listening for a book I would have completed reading in 3-4 hours.

 

Kindle somehow suffered. Whenever I accessed it on a laptop or mobile, there were enough distractions to ensure I was not fully immersed in the experience.

 

In the past, I read a few books on Kindle, but they were primarily books by my friends and people I know on social media. Books like ‘Seven Interludes’ by G. Podington (a class act on twisted tales), ‘MHADEI’ by Lynn de Souza, ‘A Scifi Sixpack’ and ‘A Scifi Fourtaler’ by Dilip Thosar’ (Interested in science fiction- try it out), ‘Maa Narmada Parikarma’ by Srinivas Shastri, a lovely book ‘Here Today Here Tomorrow’ by friends in my Insighter group ( a definite read based on future situations post covid), and ‘Dog Tails’ by Radha Thomas ( recommend pet lover to read). I was in a hurry to read these books.

 

Then there were books I may have never ordered to read but read on Kindle- like ‘A Chapter out of My Life’ by Salil Agarwal, somewhat similar to my books, ‘Life Reloaded’ and ‘Reflections’ which are true life stories that impacted the authors on their thinking and approach to Life!.

 

Then, there are books I have downloaded. Books like ‘The Surpassing Power of Liberating Structures’ and ‘Trust, Belief, Influence and Rapport’ feature in my download libraries on Kindle and a long list of books on Audible waiting to be opened. As in Audible, I earn accredit every month, and their email prompts make me download a book to keep the credits in manageable control without letting them expire.

 

Things may change a bit. On my 60th birthday, unaware of my choice and difficulty with digital on-screen reading, my son and daughter gifted me the Kindle White device. That was based on their understanding of my reading habit. They were just trying to help me in the way the digital native could. Now that I have been gifted a Kindle, I better reflect their choice in my reading. So, Kindle, here I come. In the year ahead, it could be Kindle, Kindle, Kindle all the way.

 

By Sanjeev Kotnala

 

Many of you would know what Qiddiya is all about, and a few would have gone deep into understanding it. I was blown away by the sheer magnitude of Qiddiya. I am creative and imaginative, but this was at a different level. It could be the money that makes it happen. However, it reminded me of a quote that AG Krishnamurthy often referred to in Mudra: To realise a dream, you must first dream it.

After being exposed to many development project advertising and the inbuilt exaggerated promises and plans, I wasn’t prepared for what Qiddiya was about.

 

Trapped and Pulled into The Experience

An innocent-looking tweet with an engaging audiovisual of some 150 seconds trapped me into going through an entire website where the thought was totally integrated and amplified. Why not? What started as a sizeable thematic entertainment park has blown into something expected: the giant 365 sq km megacity in Saudi Arabia. The Qiddiya project just outside Riyad, at a cost of 75 Billion Dollars, is expected to have 600K residents and bring in some 48 Million visitors annually! Promising a place where you never run out of things to do and places to go!

Here, watch the Audio-Visual that pushed me to take the trip to a well-made website that engaged you on all counts.

 

The Promise Reflected at Qiddiya

One cannot but agree with the statement, A life well lived is a life well played.

One could feel the whole sentiment while watching the audio-visuals and going through the website. It sounded so right. “Qiddiya Is The World’s Most Passionate Ambassador Of Play. A Beacon Of Hope For A Better Future, Where Play Is Not Just For The Playtime, It Is A Way Of Life… Play Is Essential To Living A Complete And Holistic Life. And As We (Qiddiya) Build Cities, We Build Lives. We Play Life.” And Riyad would be a perfect foil and example, some 45 Km from Qiddiya.

There is a survey that is used to build logic of play and life in KSA ( Kingdom of Saudi Arabia), You could ignore it- this is the only offbeat part of the whole presentation.

You can agree or disagree when it says that 90% of adults agree that play is as important for the well-being of adults as it is for children! 77% believe they would be happier in life if they played more, and 73% believe they would generate more ideas and create new things if they played more. I ignored it as an overplay, but the integration of communication with the project cannot be faulted or doubled.

Watch the audio-visual that gives you an introduction to what to expect.

 

The Six Power of Play

I loved this segment, and if you want to read more, you can visit the website. It talks of the profound effect of play on the human mind and body and how it plays a significant role in developing cognitive abilities like critical thinking, problem-solving and memory. How play is being used to fight against neurodegenerative disorders in adults like dementia including diseases like Alzheimer’s and Parkinson’s. And that immediately kicked in the mental demand to indulge in some play and games. The six powers are to Thrive, Create, Imagine, Connect, Grow, and Escape. The whole text, with the rightly justified visuals in this section, makes the web experience grand, just like the project. Truly a project that can claim to say with confidence- Qiddiya City- where fantasy meets life and gaming takes on another level.

 

THE Numbing Mega-Numbers

The numbers are numbing enough. The largest theme entertainment park spans 80 acres, the tallest at 160 m, the longest at 4 Km and the fastest at 250 Km/hour Falcon Flight roller coaster. A 23-ride, 63-acre water park constructed at 750 Million dollar cost. A Jack Nicklaus Golf course. A 7 KM race track for competitions and passenger rides. Concert arena and much more. It will host the athlete village and competitions in the 2034 Asian Games. And there are videos of the progress under Watch Play Progress. There is a sustainability angle built into the project. The project claims to work towards protecting the indigenous flora and fauna and the invaluable Arabian Heritage. It works for Enhanced Biodiversity, sustainable mobility for the community, waste management, and water resource optimisation- all planning to help achieve Qiddiya’s goal to meet Saudi Arabia’s 2030 environmental sustainability compliance vision. All signs of a place that knows what it is doing and is ready for the future.

 

Net-net

It is superb, brilliant and unprecedented. The project, communication and the website.

The dream is there and is taking shape. I don’t know when and how I will ever visit the place, but trust me, it is going into the bucket list of all the people with an iota of play in them. Hope it is completed in time. A minor escalation in the cost would bother the bankers for the project. The worry is the saying:  whenever the tallest, longest, and largest projects are completed – an economic meltdown follows. Hope we are wrong this time.

 

 

 

By Sanjeev Kotnala

 

If you are considering making resolutions, you must read this and stop wasting your time on something unstable. For me, resolutions and a need to have them are signs of something bigger- a lurking mid-life crisis. So let me wish you a Happy New Year in advance before you read any further.

 

I think we have totally misunderstood and wrongly defined a mid-life crisis. We have loaded it with the assumption that it is about sudden career changes, impulsive decisions, life-work balance, insecurities, and uncertainties. Midlife crisis is more about inner turmoil than the external materialistic world. It is the stage of finding self at a crossroads of psychological and emotional shifts necessitating a re-evaluation of status and a course correction in alignments and approach to life. It is a lot more about seeking new answers and raising fresh questions.

 

As a mid-life crisis coach, I see a mid-life crisis whenever there is a dramatic shift in responsibilities and accountability and when suddenly new expectations take birth without references to possible expressions and experiences.

 

 

Redefining Mid-life Crisis

Midlife crises are more about fulfilment, authenticity, trust, security, listening, bouncing boards and confidants. Many times, in a blind alley of life, people lack the knowledge or wrongly interpret the signs. They start grappling with a broader question, contemplating the meaning and purpose of their lives. They strongly realise they are incapable of controlling their destiny and personal development. They become confused and aimless because they are unable to sort out emotions.

 

It happens when a child becomes a teenager, a working adult and then a spouse and a parent and a grandparent. When the father becomes a father-in-law, it requires redefining the emotional space, expectations, and behavioural patterns one lives in.

 

Every stage of these changes requires an almost chrysalis type of smooth transformation. It happens when you change your professional work arena and cities to a different cultural arena. When your set of friends, hobbies and interests stop finding time for you or you start to fail to keep commitment. All these are triggers of a mid-life crisis. It’s about a lack of future thinking and a need for more trust in the current scenario.

 

I take this year-end opportunity to say that resolutions are no solutions to the mid-life crisis. I say so because resolutions are based on certain societal and personal demands that are correctible, self-controlled, and voluntary.

 

 

Self-reflections instead of Resolutions

Instead of an impulsive resolution, it is time for self-reflection. Do a deep dive to understand personal values and aspirations and how life can be aligned with them. It is okay if you don’t find answers. And it is okay if you don’t find answers for long. Do the course correction and alignment to whatever contextual findings you accumulate during introspection. Don’t hide from negatives, and don’t depend too much on positives. If you have a list of resolutions, you are in some mid-life crisis trap.

 

 

Change

Emotional turmoil and emotional imbalance resulting from a mid-life crisis can be avoided by recognising the change continuum of life. Change is a must, and we must embrace the correct change as a part of personal growth and a meaningful life; instead of resisting it, individuals should embrace it as a natural part of personal growth. These changes may be like a need for redefining career paths, exploring new hobbies, cultivating meaningful relationships, redefining the work and life balance, critically balancing the expectations and in some process, being open to saying NO to the fresh demands and expectations that friends, family and society put on you.

 

 

Need for Guidance

The crisis often magnifies because we wait to start reacting to it. We remain reactive and not proactive. We ignore these changing emotional landscapes until there is a sudden tectonic shift. Engaging with therapists, life coaches, and mid-life coaches and discussing with your confidant, spouse, and family could greatly help. It will help gain clarity on various subjects that will help in the challenging period.

 

Reassessing and focussing on Cultivating Meaningful Relationships with family, friends, and partners can provide emotional support and contribute to a sense of fulfilment that is much needed during such a phase.

 

 

You are the CEO of your Body & Life

Hell, what’s wrong. You take on significant responsibilities and deliver on the promises – except when it comes to yourself. How can you forget that your first responsibility is to yourself? You are the CEO of I-Incorporated. And hence, your prime responsibility is self-well-being. There is no better time to realign your priorities to your physical and mental well-being.

 

 

Redraft your Motivations & Passion

I am not really asking you to find the purpose. Just take care of your passion and interest. Remember things that you have on your bucket list to take care of, things that are beyond work and some of them are really personal.

 

 

Net-net

A mid-life crisis is a complex, multidimensional, and multifaceted experience yet to be understood entirely. It has many forms and is different for every individual as it is impacted by the social, family and work expectations and experiences of an individual. Rather than relying on the often repetitive resolutions that one loses track of within the first week, look at realigning yourself with self-priorities, embracing change, seeking professional guidance if needed and having meaningful relationships you can depend upon. Rest assured, a mid-life crisis is a common phenomenon, and if handled better, one will always emerge a lot stronger, wiser, and more fulfilled on the other side of the current mid-life crisis.

 

By Sanjeev Kotnala

 

This week, I read this beautiful article in The Times of India by Santosh Desai titled ‘The Anger of the Strong’. There is no denying that there is a different kind of anger on the ground, and the anger reflected on the screen is a reflection of it. Maybe an earthquake of a different type is simmering under layers of social construct.

While reflecting on this overt and covert anger, I watched the state election throw a few surprises. Some of these surprises have the political investment in women’s power, empowerment, schemes, and support behind them. It reminded me of the movie Animal, where the lead speaks about the woman selecting alpha males and the males investing in women with broader pelvic – a sign that they can bear children better. Such talk is against current social discourse. But, at the same time, Salman Khan in Bigg Boss questioned Vikki’s statement – who said he has invested in his wife. Salman Khan (in turn, the producers and the channel) objected to the word invested used by a businessman.

 

Insenstitive Bigg Boss?

Salman Khan made it sound suspiciously crude, and most likely, it was not how the businessman spoke or intended.

Salman is the host/ anchor/ curator of Bigg Boss, which has a huge following. Salman himself is a voice that is heard and followed. Should he not think twice before saying this on National TV? It will most likely adversely affect the couple (Vikki and Ankita Lokhande). Or that is purely collateral damage in the run-up to TRP. But all the participants knowingly joined the show. The relationships must be strong to survive such onslaughts of observation and doubts.

Questioning people on moral and ethical grounds has been the reality show’s way of instigating fights and debates and creating rifts. It is a necessary part of the Bigg Boss toolkit. However, they had to pull one of the participants for doing it when things went out of hand. Talk of double standards and hypocrisy.

In the current season, Bigg Boss is too involved in the game; in fact, he is playing the game. With the added advantage of omnipresent mics and cameras, Bigg Boss transparently exposes people and their possible strategies. This is hurting the show. Today, it is a show on speedbreakers rather than on steroids.

The fun is lost because it does not require much thinking on the part of the participants and the need to be agile and completely flexible. No participant has to play catchup.

 

Investing in Relationship Misunderstood

I wonder if INVESTING in a woman, love, or spouse is so wrong! And should one not see this in the context of the person who has spoken thus. Vikki is a businessman, and it may be natural for him to use terms like interest, investment, return, results, budget, profit, and loss in regular conversation. There is a possibility that an ordinary man may take a different meaning and then reflect on it in an unwarranted way. But investing in relationships and spouses is not something new. It has always been there. We all do it all the time. Tell me if I am wrong in presuming this is the reality.

 

Relationship Matrix in Bigg Bosss

In Bigg Boss Season 17, one can watch a few relationship start-ups and a few look for the cash flow of emotions and reassurance of funding of feelings every day. There are some with hic-up and no clear direction. And a few are just busy burning. Before you start reacting, let me correct it. There are more relationships than in any other season, and every relationship is not romantic, but they are definitely complicated.

 

Relationships Demand Investment

One must understand that the most valuable investments are not in monetary assets but in relationships. Be it any relationship. Father-son, Sister-brother, Husband -wife or friends. And in the relationship with a spouse, it is an idea of wholeheartedly remaining invested, proving that love, support, and personal growth are some of the most rewarding returns on investments.

Emotional investments are the foundation of a fulfilling, happy life. Nurtured emotional bonds strengthen the connection between spouses.

In Bigg Boss, Salman has questioned this very basic between two good human beings. When the couple are professionals, they have their own space, aspirations, desires, and ambitions, which demand individual attention and an assurance of appreciation from the partner. A surety of an unwavering pillar of support, offering encouragement, understanding, and sometimes even making personal sacrifices to ensure partners’ success. And this works both ways.

The partners invest in each other’s development by encouraging each other to pursue their passions and evolve as individuals, creating an environment where both partners can thrive individually and as a couple. This is the prime truth behind successful unions.

Investment in a relationship must be understood.

Every human needs a portfolio of relationships within Family, close society, community and professional workspace. Each of them demands different types of investment of time, effort, emotions and feelings, including growing expectations. These resources are never in abundance. Hence, the trade-off and skews lead to inevitable stress and strain.

 

Bigg Boss Relationships and Investment.

People watching Bigg Boss would know it best, but here is a rough map for those not in the loop.

It is the mid-season; a fresh set of investments are being made in new and existing relationships. The expectations are more precise and less transparent. The stage is set for the state where the relationships will matter a hell of a lot more, or the investment will turn sour.

These investments are being made with short- and long-term expectations. Participants have thrown the caution out of the way and yet forget that past performance is no guarantee of future results- and that is true for all our relationships.

Vikki, who ‘invested’ in Ankita Lohkhande and feels low sometimes for being referred to as Anita Lohkhande’s husband. Samarth, the current boyfriend of I Love You Now- I Don’t Love You Now – Isha and her ex-Abhishek, who still has an affinity for her, create an acute angled love triangle. The relationship to watch is of Samarth and Abhishek- the ex and the current.

Arun and now-ejected Tahelkha were one solid Jai-Veeru relationship. However, surprisingly, Arun is pally and thick with Abhishek, who masterminded Tehelka’s ouster in many ways.

Aishwariya and her husband, Neel- have different dynamics of dominance and excuses with coupled individuality.

Kamzadi, the fire band and my favourite from Assam, is a no-nonsense, controlled, non-romantic relationship with Abhishek and a love-hate one with Manara. She is a wild card and unpredictable, but she is sensible and individually strong like women from Assam. In fact, she needs a minor realignment to get back in the game.

Sana, the lawyer, is searching for a relationship every nomination day. Then there is Rinku – who may say what is a relationship but just a transaction!

 

Net-net

Investing in relationships is needed and an integral part of its nurturing. These are the emotions, feelings, time and effort, care, passion, and sometimes money. None of these are abundant, so one must choose the right relationship to Invest in and look forward to significant ROI.

 

 

 

By Sanjeev Kotnala

 

In an age dominated by information overload and social media, people suffer from an unacknowledged pressure to have an opinion on every subject. From global geopolitical conflicts to social justice issues, from wokeism to LGBT issues, from sports to religion, individuals find themselves compelled to take a stance and make it public. However, amidst the clamour for voices to be heard, a fundamental right deserves recognition—the individual right not to have an opinion on every subject.

It is a rarity for me not to hold a firm opinion on a subject. However, there have been instances when I found myself in doubt, uncertain of the side I should take. This dilemma arises from my attempt to be rational and logical, evaluating everything based on facts and direct inferences rather than relying on gut feelings and beliefs.

I understand that It’s a challenge, and I firmly believe that one’s belief and value systems can come to the rescue, nudging the opinion. And, there’s no shame in not having an opinion; being open to suggestions, fresh thoughts, and new evidence.

 

Multiple Subjects and Questions

Numerous incidents in the past and more to come often leave me indecisive. Questions like whether Artificial Intelligence (AI) benefits humans, who is right in the conflict between Ukraine and Russia, or whether brands should publicly state their stances on social issues are complex and polarising.

Such issues and the stance could divide communities, making it challenging to take a stance that doesn’t alienate others. Sometimes, putting thoughts to paper and conducting a pro-con evaluation help clarify my stance.

However, in such a situation, I remind myself that nobody expects me to have an opinion on everything. It is impossible to be aware of every event in my extended ecosystem surroundings or have enough knowledge to take a stance. I tell myself that it is okay to take a stance only if I have been conscientious, consistent, and coherent in my thinking. After all, my responsibility is first to myself, and I need to be fair and truthful to myself. And I reserve the right not to have an opinion.

 

The Pressure to Have an Opinion

There is an overwhelming influx of information. Content generation and consumption are on the rise with the rise of the internet. The news cycle is short, relentless and sensational. Social media serves a constant stream of diverse perspectives and debates with a question- what do you think about it?

It asks the individuals to be well-versed on an array of topics, ready to articulate informed opinions at a moment’s notice. However, we must acknowledge the limitations of human capacity. No one can be an expert on everything, and an attempt to have opinions on every issue can only lead to superficial understanding and misinformed perspectives.

Therefore, the right not to have an opinion is a safeguard against the perils of information overload, allowing individuals the freedom to prioritise depth over breadth in their knowledge.

With their algorithms and echo chambers, social media platforms significantly contribute to individuals’ pressure to voice their opinions publicly and create biased narratives, often overshadowing the importance of thoughtful consideration.

Unfortunately, we are in a trap of perceptions. We seriously are afraid that the changing social expectations does not accept silence; there is pressure to take sides even when you may prefer to say, “I don’t know.” It should be entirely acceptable for someone else to have a different opinion based on logic, facts, expectations, experiences, or beliefs. Unfortunately, we often challenge the thinker more than the thoughts, working to find out whose side the other person is on.

 

The Right to No Opinion Promotes Better Understanding

In such an ecosystem, the right not to have an opinion is an unrecognised essential tool for self-preservation—avoiding the pitfalls of performative engagement and virtue signalling. The right not to have an opinion also protects against the potential consequences of expressing a viewpoint that may not align with prevailing narratives. It asks and allows the individual to engage with essential subjects at their own pace, allowing space and time for information collection, analysis, and genuine understanding before contributing to the discourse.

 

Right to Not Have an Opinion Promotes Diversity

The right not to have an opinion promotes cognitive diversity, something crucial for encouraging innovation and well-rounded decision-making. Society benefits from unique perspectives, including acknowledging one’s limitations in knowledge.

Embracing the right not to have an opinion encourages a culture where people feel comfortable saying, “I don’t know,” fostering an atmosphere of humility and continuous learning.

Implementing the Right. It will happen when society celebrates individuals who choose thoughtful contemplation over hasty judgments.

One must note that the right not to have an opinion is not an abdication of civic responsibility but a recognition that genuine engagement with complex issues requires time, consideration, and a commitment to understanding nuance.

 

Net-net

Exercising the right not to have an opinion is an act of self-care and mental and emotional well-being in the face of incessant demands for input. It is a statement acknowledging that one’s worth should not be determined by the frequency or tonality of their public declarations but by the depth of their understanding and the authenticity of their contributions.

If you agree, let us champion the right not to have an opinion. In doing so, we would honour the diversity of human cognition, encourage genuine dialogue, and create a space where thoughtful introspection is valued as much as vocal expression.

Before taking a public stance on a subject, ask yourself if you have enough knowledge to defend your position to yourself and if there’s a need to voice your opinion. If the answer is yes, proceed carefully, consistently, and conscientiously with your thinking. Avoid voicing opinions solely to please a particular group, fit into a community, or as an ill-informed immediate reaction.

 

PostScript

The above is my POV, and your POV could support or be completely divergent… I respect and acknowledge them in both cases.

 

By Sanjeev Kotnala

 

Recently, fake videos of actress Katrina and Mandana went viral, and people started talking about the possible dangers. People were not so worried when it was suggested that such videos and AI-generated content could influence the outcome of elections and how the masses react to events. Slowly, people realised that more is possible. If the wheels of technology change – and more specifically, Artificial Intelligence (AI) and its different avatars accelerate and remain uncontrolled, the human race would be doomed. The more significant fear and problem is that maybe it has already entered a phase where it is no longer controllable.

 

Niti Ayog is not off the mark when its strategy document for AI in India says, “AI. is poised to disrupt our world. With intelligent machines enabling high-level cognitive processes like thinking, perceiving, learning, problem-solving and decision-making, coupled with advances in data collection and aggregation, analytics and computer processing power, AI presents opportunities to complement and supplement human intelligence and enrich how people live and work”.

 

However, we all know that knives are not the problem. The problem is how to use it. You can use it to cut the vegetable or to murder someone. Similarly, the rope can be used to climb a wall or commit suicide. AI. is such a knife and rope that we are unsure of possibilities and the direction we can/will take. So, it is okay if most want to cut vegetables. But, there will be few who would like to put it to other use, which could be decisive.

 

DUALITY IN LIFE

I firmly believe in the Duality in life. Two sides of the same coin concept. So, if there is so much positive potential, there must be a set of potentially harmful and hazardous possibilities. It does not matter whether we have been able to think through them, recognise or not.

There is a strong lobby crying for universal collective control of the progress of AI and the way and speed at which the technology is evolving. Of course, some naysayers poo-poo these sensible voices.

Remember, typically, crime has always been ahead of the law. And the case of A.I. is no different. However, the scale of dynamic changes and possibilities in AI make this chase and gap threaten the human race.

 

AI BHASMASURA.

Many readers would know the Bhasmasura story. The Rakshash was granted a boon by Bhole Bhandari- Bhole Nath- Har Har Mahadev. The boon was simple. Whoever’s head Bhasmasura will keep his hand, that being will turn to Ashes. Once the boon was granted, Bhasmasura wanted to keep his hand on Shiva’s head. To save the situation, Bhagwan Vishnu had to take Mohani’s (attractive) disguise and flirt with Basmasura. Mohini agreed to marry Bhasmasura if he could defeat/copy her in dance. The Dance started. At one stage, Mohini keeps her hand on her head, and Bhasmasura copies it- thus turning himself into Ashes.

The question is simple. Have we created a technology Bhasmasura?

The answer seems more Yes than No.

Many will still defend it, saying how we develop and utilise it remains to be seen. These people believe they will have AI under control and never allow it to fight the human race. For them, AI will always remain the protector! The other side says, ‘The day A.I. is capable of talking, feeling, and reacting to emotions like desire, ambition, love, and care and can create without the help of humans, the machines would rebel. By then, humans will be redundant for the planet or slaves of the machines’. Now, this seems far-fetched to many and a distant future to many. True, time will have the answer. I am on the side of people who believe that we are doomed.

Now, this raises the second question. Do we have a Mohini ready for AI Bhasmasura?

The answer is capital NO.

 

THE GLOBAL WARNING.

The Global leaders recognise the possibilities. They do know that unless reined well and AI’s path and progress is controlled, AI Could Cause ‘Catastrophic’ Harm. 298 Governments, Including the U.K., the U.S., and China, have agreed to cooperate to collectively evaluate the risk of Artificial Intelligence. All agree on harnessing and regulating artificial intelligence under the Bletchley Declaration.

The document emphasises that ‘AI should be designed, developed, deployed, and used, in a safe manner, in such a way as to be human-centric, trustworthy and responsible. AI should be used to promote inclusive economic growth, sustainable development and innovation to protect human rights and fundamental freedoms. And that we all must foster public trust and confidence in AI systems to fully realise their potential.’

They agree that ‘There is potential for serious, even catastrophic, harm, either deliberate or unintentional, stemming from the most significant capabilities of these A.I. models”. And if you read them, it clearly shows significant distrust in how it is developing. And we do not trust that AI will only work in ways that benefit the human race. Job loss is no longer a possibility but something that could significantly change the fabric of the society. The role AI can play in disinformation, fake news and security breaches is no longer a bad dream. It is a reality. It could end with major cyber attacks freezing the national networks or designing weapons against Humans. May one day even rebel against the very creator of AI’.

 

FUTURE UNCERTAIN, UNEPLAINED AND OPAQUE

Like every other technology in the past, AI is definitely ahead of regulators.

Regulators are still trying to comes with terms of Global C0llective Regulation.

They thus keep the door open for toxicity, misinformation, weaponisation, rogue controls and unintended developments.

The safety and security of individual independent nations come first. So, while they talk of collective initiative, individual countries are busy creating their own regulatory frameworks.

The US has been off the block with an executive order that necessarily asks companies working in the A.I. space to assess the impact of technology on national security risks before letting the public use or experience it.

The European Union’s AI Act is an absolute outreach, and no one expects the stringent rules to be followed.

There is a problem of agreement between the state and the organisation regarding what is relevant and impactful and what is too much of a constraint.

We continue to debate which organisations should be exempt from the restrictions. We all know and recognise that just one such exemption can backfire on the human race.

We don’t know and can not wholly appreciate the possibilities.

We are thus in no position to create regulations, and the technology is evolving at a pace that the time is running out for us.

 

Net-net

This is the time to act. Take a stance and operate.

If the fear is real, the regulations should also be real and practical, evolving with time.

We should be able to react to and regulate the four distinct AI technology types. The reactive, limited memory, Theory of mind, and self-aware A.I.

When Emotive AI gets developed with the Theory of mind, when it starts becoming tough to differentiate between humans and machines and when the machines start making decisions just like the humans- the results will be more damaging.

When we have ‘Self-N-Aware AI’, where the machine is aware of its own emotions and the emotions of others around it, they have a level of consciousness and intelligence similar to human beings. It will be the stage of A.I. with desires, needs, and ambitions.

We all know what happens when such feelings are hotwired to memory and the mind that can remember, decide and execute.

The problem is not that we are getting there. The problem is that we will get there one way or the other.

It is possible that the 10th Avatar of Bhagwan Vishu, Kalki, is a hugely strong, fast, independent super A.I. with state of mind awareness and full of Human emotions, capable of reflecting and meditating. Capable of thinking, planning and executing plans full of desperate ambitions and desires… then for the human race, the time will start running out. The fight for survival will begin, and then there can only be one winner- the Bhasmasura- unless we have a Mohini in place.