By Ranjona Banerji
India Shining said a newspaper headline in the Financial Express. Something to do with the stockmarket being “second” globally. Once you make sense of that, time to read other articles about how we’re shining.
Like Bloomberg quoting the Centre for Monitoring the Indian Economy, which says that unemployment has surged to a 16-month high, now standing at 8.30 per cent. Borrowing costs have also gone by up 255 basis points in a year.
I’m not a mumbo-jumbo specialist so the best I can parse that for you is that India is shining because the stock market has been high – only one other country has been higher – and also because unemployment has also been high as has been borrowing.
Basically, this is even better than negative growth.
Because everything is high.
And we understand that.
As long as we love the king emperor, there are no hallucinogenic substances which can make up happier. Or, um, higher.
It’s like an argument that I heard from our various important influencers that you cannot discuss people in other countries, even children, dying from Indian-made cough medicines, because that attacks Brand India. This is second only to the argument that we cannot complain because Indians and Indian children did not die. Only foreigners did.
When the media buys these two explanations, you know that we’re in for a great year of media capitulation. Even better than the last one.
How interested are we in the cough syrup attempt to discredit Brand India?
The latest incident is from Uzbekistan, where at least 18 children have died after drinking an Indian-made cough syrup.
https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-asia-india-64114240
This follows the deaths of 60 children in Gambia who died after drinking another Indian-made cough syrup.
Both contained illegal, toxic elements.
Both companies have been known to break the laws – such as they are – in the past.
But you know. Our love is taking us higher…
I understand also that few care about Muslim homes being demolished in Haldwani. The mainstream media is really not interested unless they can find a way to vilify Muslims. I know I know. You know this, I know this.
But remember that India is shining because of the stockmarket.
I was also privileged to read a former bureaucrat telling us that how after 75 years, the world is finally paying attention to India because of the King emperor. Impressed as I was to read this, I found the maths a little suspect. Because I am certain that the Ascension to the throne took place in 2014. But maybe the world took a while to get higher and higher.
Shhh… Don’t mention that cough syrup.
There are few other things we cannot mention.
Rahul Gandhi springs to mind. And that walk that he’s on. You know. The one no one will talk about. It reached Delhi, I heard.
But Modi ji, he inaugurated a train in a virtual manner immediately after he lost his Mother. Deepest condolences.
Of course, it’s not that the media is that exciting elsewhere. When I am know they discuss the weather and Brexit and the weather. Temperatures are higher than they should be.
I told you. 2023 is basically taking us higher. Into confusion, death, unemployment and temperatures.
Ranjona Banerji is a senior journalist and commentator. She writes on MxMIndia on Tuesdays and Fridays. Her views here are personal.